


Be More Chill Kagerou

by DoomSweater89



Category: Be More Chill - Iconis/Tracz
Genre: Based on Kagerou Days, Established Relationship, Fluff and Angst, I had no idea how to title this, Its a great song you should listen to it, M/M, Mentions MacDoesIt, Panic Attacks, Someone gets hit by a truck, boyf riends - Freeform, he's a great YouTuber you should watch him, ok i'll stop tagging now, post cannon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-23
Updated: 2018-03-23
Packaged: 2019-04-06 21:25:34
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,499
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14065890
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DoomSweater89/pseuds/DoomSweater89
Summary: Okay so yeah I haven't written anything in a hot minute so I wrote this cause i'm obsessed with BMC OuO;;;THIS IS BASED ON AN ANIMATIC BY MUSHIE R SO CHECK IT OUT CAUSE IT'S AMAZING!!https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lxcRcV19RL8Also thanks to my friend Kami for beta reading and helping me word things better cause I suck at that. :p(Btw this does switch point of views so if you don't like that... too bad :p)





	Be More Chill Kagerou

**Author's Note:**

> Okay so yeah I haven't written anything in a hot minute so I wrote this cause i'm obsessed with BMC OuO;;;
> 
> THIS IS BASED ON AN ANIMATIC BY MUSHIE R SO CHECK IT OUT CAUSE IT'S AMAZING!!  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lxcRcV19RL8
> 
> Also thanks to my friend Kami for beta reading and helping me word things better cause I suck at that. :p
> 
> (Btw this does switch point of views so if you don't like that... too bad :p)

_Black and white._

_Jeremy is sitting on the swing set in the park near Michael’s house. Him and Michael used to go to this park a lot as kids and it was even the place they went for their first date, it’s a very special place to the both of them. Speaking of Michael, he is there too, sitting on the swing next to Jeremy. No words are said but everything feels calm and peaceful._

_Michael pets the cat on his lap. Jeremy doesn’t recognize the cat from anywhere, but it appears to make Michael happy, so he doesn’t mind its presence. He finds the cutest part of Michael petting the cat isn’t the cat itself, but how happy his boyfriend looks. Michael looks up at Jeremy and gives him one of his warm smiles. This, as always, makes Jeremy’s heart swell._

_Michael breaks the warm gaze, looking down. His smile fades and the silence becomes concerning. Jeremy attempts to ask, but his words seem to be trapped in his throat. Michael looks back up, his smile returning, but more remorseful than before. He speaks for the first time since this began._

_“でもまぁ夏は嫌いかな.” He says in a bold, almost annoyed tone. Jeremy has no idea what he said but his tone of voice confuses and concerns him. Before anything else can be said, the cat leaps off from Michael. Michael is obviously surprised and tries to go after the cat. Jeremy only stands up and watches them, not caring as much about the cat getting away._

_Jeremy watches the cat run onto the road._

_Jeremy watches Michael run after it._

_Jeremy sees a flicker of the light changing._

_Jeremy sees a truck approaching._

_Jeremy begins to sprint and tries to warn Michael._

_Jeremy’s words fall upon deaf ears._

_Stop, Michael is in the middle of the road._

_Stop, time seems to slow._

_Stop, Jeremy reaches out._

_“Stop!”_

_Red._

_So much red._

_Michael lays in front of the truck._

_The smell. Oh God, the smell._

_Jeremy screams and sobs, finally finding his voice._

_He wants to run to Michael, but he can’t seem to move._

_Jeremy panics as he watches the red come out of Michael._

_He sees a man across the street, he’s very familiar._

_Blue._

_He’s blue._

_He looked at Jeremy with a smirk._

_He speaks._

_Jeremy tunes out the mans voice to focus on Michael, who lays limply on the ground._

_His sobs grow louder._

_The man continues to speak to Jeremy._

_Michael is red._

_Everything is red._

_Jeremy can see the blue contrasting all the red._

_He begins to feel light headed from all the screaming colors._

_Before everything darkens, the blue man speaks once more._

_Jeremy finally understands._

_“You were always quite the loser, weren’t you Jeremy?”_

Jeremy wakes up in a cold sweat, jolting into a sitting position. He’s so panicked, he doesn’t even notice the arms wrapped around him, nor that he had just been sleeping.

_“Michael’s dead? No. No. No! He can’t be! HE CAN’T BE!”_ He screams in his head, his thoughts only getting louder and louder as he begins to hyperventilate. He feels tears streaming down his face, but he doesn’t do anything. He can’t feel anything else, not even the body next to him stirring. He doesn’t notice his vision darken around the edges. All he does is wrap his arms around himself, his breathes coming out in gasps.

________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ 

I was suddenly woken up to hear someone gasping for air. I sleepily grab my glasses from the nightstand and once my vision clears up, I see Jeremy having a panic attack. Without even thinking I wrap my arms around him and try to get his attention.

“Jer. Jer calm down. Its ok I’m right here. You’re ok.” He doesn’t respond, his breathing only getting worse. I end up physically turning him towards me and making him look at me. When I do, his eyes widen, and he stops breathing. 

“Jeremy it’s ok, you’re ok. Breathe with me ok?” I say before taking deep breaths, in hopes he’ll follow my example. It takes him a second but soon he gasps air into his lungs and starts to cough before trying to take deep breaths. He keeps trying but after some time of it not seeming to work very well, I grab his hand and place it on my bare chest.

“Get your heart beat to match mine ok? It’s ok. Y-you can do this.” I say in a shaky voice, trying to calm my own heart beat to go to a semi normal pace for Jeremy to match. Jeremy gives a small, shaky nod as he continues to try and breathe while calming his heart. I wipe away at the constant stream of tears going down his face as he does.

It takes a few minutes, but Jeremy is soon reduced to simple sobs as I cradle his head in my arms. I whisper reassuring things to him in an attempt at comforting him which seems to have worked, somewhat. Jeremy soon lifts his hand shakily and points to the bottle of Mountain Dew Red we always keep next to the bed just in case he has a dream about you-know-who or hears any voices. I quickly grab it, pour some of it into a cup we have ready and shakily help Jeremy drink some while trying to make sure he doesn’t choke. After he’s done I put the cup back on the nightstand and pull Jeremy into a hug.

After some time, Jeremy is reduced to sniffles and I slowly pull away to look at him.

“You ok Jer-bear?” I whisper in the softest voice I can as to not startle him. He looks at me with a sad look that breaks my heart to see before shaking his head and hugging me again. I, of course, return the hug and stroke his back in a comforting manner. “You wanna talk about it?” I say in the same voice. He flinches and freezes for a bit before giving a small nod with a sigh.

He pulls away and takes a deep breathe before explaining his dream in a quiet voice.

“I-I well I had a d-dre-drea- a nightmare…” He starts before taking another deep breath and continuing. “I-it started out nice… we were sitting on the s-swings in the park a-and you had a c-cat on your l-lap. Then…” He trails off, tears welling up in his eyes again. I put my hand on his shoulder, stroking it with my thumb and nodding for him to go on. He nods back weakly, takes another deep breath, and goes on to tell me in the dream he saw me get hit by a truck while chasing the cat and that the computer demon we both know was there, saying his usual bullshit.

“Th-there was s-so much _blood_ and I-“ He starts to cry again. I pull him into another hug.

“I’m so sorry Miah… that must have been horrible.” I mutter stroking his back. “But I’m ok see? Everything is fine. _We’re ok.”_ I continue to repeat the last part until once again, he’s reduced to sniffles.

“I-I love you so much Michael… p-please don’t leave me…” He says in the most broken voice I’ve probably ever heard. My heat sinks, I hate seeing Jeremy like this. Sure, he fucked up big time, but no one deserves this. I pull out of the hug, wipe a tear off his face and kiss his forehead.

“Never. I will never leave you Jer, I promise. I love you too.” I announce softly but seriously, resting my forehead on his and giving him the warmest smile I can muster. He returns it with his own sad smile before giving me a short kiss and pulling me into a hug.

These types of nightmares are nothing new, he’s been having them ever since the incident. But he’s never had one where I die, at least not to my knowledge, it honestly kind of freaks me out to think about. Either way, it always hurts to see Jeremy reduced to such a weak state, especially when he seems to really be improving.

We embrace for a while in silence before I finally pull away. “Wanna watch some MacDoesIt videos?” I mutter in a somewhat baby voice to lighten the mood. He gives a weak chuckle before nodding and I move to grab the laptop that sits next to the Mountain Dew Red. Probably not the smartest place to put it, but we were too tired to care the day prior.

I put on one of Macs fashion review videos as we lean back onto the headboard, Jeremy cuddling into my side. We soon start to drift off in the middle of one of the videos, wrapped around each other like vines. Might not have been the best night but I couldn’t be happier to see Jeremy smiling in his sleep before drifting off myself.

**Author's Note:**

> Why do I torture my sons this way. :"D


End file.
